Every time I interview a 40-something woman for 40:20 Vision I ask them what three “gifts” would they give a 20-something if they were a “Forty-Godmother”. In essence, three things to help you get a head start on perspective and gain the confidence you need to make decisions that are right for you. No more woulda, coulda, shoulda.
1. Focus on what you have vs. what you don’t have. Then build. That is the one thing I can say changed from 20 to 40 and made the biggest different on how I live your life.
2. It’s how you tell your story not what the story is. But you have to be careful not to rewrite the stories of your past in your own head so you don’t make the same story over and over again. Good storytelling — creating the story that links up all your job experience into a learning curve that highlights the strengths and skills that are a through-line. Bad storytelling — forgetting all the bad parts of your relationships rather than learning from them as well.
3. Figure out how to spend time alone. You don’t want to makes decisions based on fear of being alone. You want meaningful relationships not fillers.