What three “gifts” would you give a 20-something if you were a “Forty-Godmother”? 40-something women share three things to help a 20-something get a head start on the confidence to make decisions that are right for themselves. No more woulda, coulda, shoulda.
1. Be thoughtful about career decisions. In your twenties don’t just put salary before passion. Now is the time to take a pay cut if it means getting on the path to work that you love doing.
2. Don’t try to plan it that much. You can’t say, “At this age I want this” because it’s not going to happen. When I think back to every relationship I had, some were great and some were not. But now I can’t imagine being with anybody but the person I’m with. It’s the best relationship I’ve ever had in my life. If I had to wait forty three years to find him, that’s fine because if I had married somebody else when I was thirty I’d probably be miserable or divorced by now. I don’t know that I would’ve been happy and I think that finding somebody when you’re older, you know more what you want, you know more of what’s going to work and you understand yourself more.
3. When it comes to marriage, good enough is not good enough. It has to be great. Don’t stay with someone just because they are there and you don’t like dating. I love being in a good relationship but dating is like torture to me. So I was in this relationship and he was good to me and sweet and that was good enough. But then I finally got to the point where I realized this isn’t good enough. I’d rather be on my own. I finally left.
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