Leaning on Your Friends vs. Learning to Trust Your Own Gut

Today I’m sharing an insightful guest post from a 20-something learning to trust her gut . Advice is not to take, but to take in and see what fits for you. In the end it can help you learn to trust your own instincts.  Sometimes there is a big difference between something that is not right and something that is wrong, particularly when it comes to love and heartache. Here’s to loving and learning and learning to listen to yourself!


Have you ever been in a relationship you knew wasn’t the right one for you? Instead of separating yourself from it you chose to only look at the handful of right pieces?

After an almost movie script start it was obvious I shouldn’t let myself get in too deep. I had friends advising against investing my time and energy as they predicted what was to come. Around this time I discussed the situation with a mentor explaining how I respected the advice and understood it was coming from a place of love; however, as a 20-something saw greater importance in forging my own path.

I did not set out to change the guy (because we all know pigs will fly first), but I committed to fully experiencing the relationship – the perks right along with the lows. Guess which parts stand out in my mind now that it’s ended?

At what point do you realize it’s better to take someone’s advice than make your own mistakes? Or does that revelation ever exist?

If the roles were reversed and a friend came to me questioning a relationship I would listen to her concerns and share my experience/advice when relevant, but ultimately I would challenge her to go with her gut when making decisions.

I’ve typically been indecisive when it comes to my relationships opting instead for friends to provide input and making choices from that. Maybe it’s maturity, maybe it’s a new form of stubbornness, but lately I’ve wanted to tell less during my questioning stage and see how I manage without the input from a handful of friends. It’s a liberating feeling – being in complete control of my choices.

The lows aside, I’m trying to appreciate what I can and bring the lessons into future relationships. Until I can put together all the right pieces and find my right whole.

–        20-something working through life’s questions one amazing day at a time 

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