Every time I interview a 40-something woman for 40:20 Vision I ask them what 3 “gifts” would they give a 20-something if they were a “Forty-Godmother”. Here are one woman’s gifts:
The ability to stop obsessing about s*** you cannot control. Be okay with where you are and who you are. I wish I had stopped trying to fix myself. That is not to say you can’t work on the things you can control. I worked pretty hard in my twenties to arrive at happiness. I worked through a couple of super dark phases and realized there are things you can control. You just have to realize you have a choice to focus on the good or the bad.
A diary. Keep a diary where you write down 5 the things you are thankful for everyday. When the list has cigarettes and beer on it more days than not then you really have to start thinking. Really…look around you probably have a great set of friends. Hopefully you have a wonderful family. You have amazing job opportunities ahead of you if you work hard. Just find things that you are good at and be thankful for them. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to be something else.
Forgiveness. Life is not always going to be easy. If you saw me in college I was the most depressed person. I didn’t want to be the dark, moody, broody girl. I wanted to be fun, happy. It was really hard some days but you have to forgive yourself and not get down on yourself for the down days. Then pick yourself up and focus on what you do have instead of what you don’t have. Life is hard sometimes. It’s not your fault and it’s not unique to you. I spent too much time thinking that other people had it easy. It goes back to just recognizing that everybody has their S*** days, even the cute people that were getting hit on every night or seem like they have charmed lives.