Dreams Take Shape When You Can See Yourself Clearly

Over the fourth of July I read “The One That I Want”, a novel by Allison Winn Scotch. It was a great beach read but also a story of the journey from 20 to 40 – or rather the journey to knowing oneself. A woman coming to terms with seeing things they way they are instead of they way she thinks they are supposed to be and hiding behind her dreams. It’s an entertaining read with a message that you sort of know when you first start reading …but it draws you in with it’s real characters and a fun twist around being able to “see” the past through a new lens. Perfect 40:20 Vision fodder.

Today I’m sharing a passage that was from the main character thinking about what she would tell her 17-year-old self.

“I would tell her that life is limitless, that fear is conquerable, that if you stay concealed in the shadows, you’ll never be seen. That spending the better part of your days trying to fix people may be admirable; no, it is admirable, but only when you’re not doing it to avoid fixing yourself. You can plug up all the holds in a boat, after all, but if you never learn how to navigate choppy waters, you still may drown. I would tell her that dreams can be small, but they are still dreams, even if it is to taste an escargot in Paris or snap a timeless image of the Eiffel Tower or run down the Champs-Elysees, gaping at the too expensive stores, the night air on your back, the lights and the stars and the electricity palpably charging around you. Even, if it is to coach a college team to victory because you’ll never again feel the snap of the bat and the rush of the cheer from the crowd and the dry dirt against your cheek as you slide into home plate.

I would tell her it isn’t too late. That the years are long and the road is winding and that dreams float out there to be captured, but only if you are brave enough to reach out and grab them.”


This passage reminded me of a 40-something talking about dreams. That you are never too old to dream…and that dreams do change. That dreams you have when you are younger are sometimes what other people want for you but that dreams when you are older tend to be your dreams. And they may be different. Some people may see that as giving up on a dream but it’s just getting to see more clearly and realizing what your strengths are and what you want. It may a different path to a dream or it may be a huge new dream that only now you realize you are capable of achieving.

It was also a story of coming to terms with the push and pull between leaving a small town or staying. A lot of 40-something women recommend leaving for a time or traveling, but the point is…don’t let wherever you live keep you from growing. Don’t just run around in the same circles doing the same thing and thinking that that is all there is out there. There is a whole world out there and it’s accessible to you no matter where you live.

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