We all feel the pressure to achieve some imaginary “to-do” list. There’s a sense that we only have a window of time in our 20s to accomplish so much. Sometimes that leads to rushing into things or choosing a path before it’s time. It’s time to explore yes…but use that time. Don’t just fill it with distractions and being on-the-go 24/7. 40:20 hindsight: You may feel like you’re missing out on something if you’re not constantly going and doing and achieving…but you’re not. You may just miss out on figuring out what you really want. Here’s one woman’s perspective on this.
“Go slowly, in spite of all the temptation. Don’t rush to climb the ladder and realize a decade later this isn’t even who you are. It isn’t what you want or what you enjoy doing. You look back and say ‘S***. If only I’d known myself better at 20, I never would’ve done this as a career.’ It’s a terrible spot to be in. I’m sure everybody says it was all for the best. You wouldn’t be who you are. You wouldn’t have learned. But I don’t buy that.
I spent years in my 20’s just going out with friends, partying … being drawn toward the limelight. I was wasting so much time. I don’t believe that created the person I am now. As a matter of fact, I think I compartmentalize that part of me because it wasn’t me. It was false and it just wasted a lot of time – both with relationships and with jobs.
It’s natural to be afraid but don’t let that fear force you into hiding from yourself. If you put so much pressure on yourself, you find ways to distract yourself until you get away from it. So I think maybe it’s about not putting that kind of pressure on yourself. That puts up the barrier to your getting to know yourself. The world is not watching you. The imaginary camera that’s taking a picture of you isn’t really there. You can let yourself feel some freedom to figure s*** out. Slow down. Don’t chase the ladder or the limelight. Take some time to just be with yourself too.”
— 40-something, Los Angeles, CA