Recently a 20-something asked me if self-acceptance gets any easier with age. Most definitely. It’s the beauty of aging. Ironically when you are young and fresh skinned, you are also the most thin-skinned. More often than not, criticizing yourself for imagined flaws or insecurities and looking to others for cues of acceptance. Then as you get older, you learn to see beauty in your foibles and failures and genuinely learn to like yourself even if you are not in the throes of youth as we know it (the beauty ideal our culture has come to celebrate). That is when you begin to care less about what other people think, develop your own style, develop your own voice and put it out there without thinking twice.
To get a head start on that just try for a day a week, or an hour a day to live your life without letting what other people think influence you. Tap into what you like, what you think and say it out loud or in a journal. Start by telling yourself one thing you do love about yourself too. Be your own best advocate.
“It’s really impossible to get caught up in the comparisons when you are present.” – Wellness coach, business owner, New York City
“Don’t care what other people think. To be in your twenties and not care what people thought of you. That would be perfect. It would be pure experience. Everything you learn would be new and every experience would be fresh. And it can be. You can make it happen at any time. Strangely, I think not caring what other people think would make everyone want to be your friend. – Hotel industry executive and passionate traveler, Los Angeles, CA
“Before you put your feet on the ground in the morning, tell yourself 10 great things about yourself. This is something I’ve learned for myself later in life. We need to take responsibility for feeling good and secure about ourselves. I think it’s the #1 thing that we forget to do.
So just tell yourself ten great things. Do it in your mind. Do it every day and it will become a habit and you believe it. It’s just a great way to begin the day. They could be the silliest things to like the most important things. Just tell yourself 10 great things. I think you have to take the time to be thankful and I think it makes you stop to be in the moment and appreciate life and have more awareness around you. I think that’s huge.” – 40-something, design, New York City