12 Reflections on Looking Forward
December 31st, 2012
Happy New Year’s Eve. It’s that time of year of looking back, reflecting and most importanly looking forward. To look forward I took a look back at some of the highlights of 40:20 Vision this year. I won’t call this a best of …but here are twelve 40-something words of wisdom to provide perspective!
1. Have You Looked At All Your Options?
“Approach every situation as one option among many…not your only option. Nothing in your twenties is a have to have. There is a time when your options will be more limited…but not in your twenties.”
2. Don’t Forget To Wear Underwear
“Good things, maybe even the best things, take a long time to cultivate. Invest in yourself. Do a few things in your 20s that you know will not have an immediate pay-off. Learn how to cook, sew, sing, dance, or sail and be a master at it! Invest in something other than a vacation or a fancy dress Take it all with a grain of salt and on that note…go live your life and have a great time! But don’t forget to wear underwear.”
3. Things Every Lost 20s Should Know
“I wish that I had spent much less time trying to look cool and much more time asking my friends and colleagues questions about what made them tick. Don’t waste time with people who don’t give back or who exhaust you. Be kind to the people whose good opinions you value. Those people could be anywhere, so take the time to learn about the people you meet and stay in touch with the good ones.”
4. I Wish I Had Slept Around More
“The best path you can take as a 20something is to get to know yourself. You do that by challenging yourself, going deep into interests and friendships, traveling—anything that broadens your life experience. It is through those experiences that you will gain faith in your ability to make your own smart choices and confidence in who you are.”
5. Does Fear Of Uncertainly Go Ever Go Away?
“Embrace it. I firmly believe that only really stupid people are never afraid. There are good reasons to be afraid! Life can be manageable even if it’s scary. Think about how the possible scenarios might play out. What is the thing that you are most afraid of happening? Now imagine that it’s happened, and think about what you’d do to get through it. What’s the next worst thing? How might you deal with that situation when it happens?”
6. This Is What Fake It Til You Make It Looks Like
“After a few years, or maybe even your late twenties, you hit this mark when you realize, “I’m not pretending. I’m on my own now. I can do this”. I finally hit this level and said…no one is going to tell me what to do during the day. I just have to get it done. You find your own way.”
7. On Negotiation – If You Know Your Strength, Sweat It Out
“Twenty year olds who have work experience should go into job offers realizing they are bringing something to the table. Frankly, I think I would have been more respected when I started out if I took more credit for what I had done. It’s saying, “You better take me seriously.”
8. Learning to Be More Flexible
“We never stop comparing ourselves completely, but one thing many 40-somethings find is that they wish they spent more time in their 20s and 30s celebrating what they had rather than obsessing over what they didn’t have. It’s amazing how much more flexible you can be when you stop comparing yourself to others. You can truly stretch yourself.”
9. On Pitching – Don’t Seek Feedback Too Soon
“You are asking for money not a point-of-view. Only care about the feedback if you are in. Then you can talk how to make the idea better and close the deal.”
10. Flash Friday: What’s Your Risk Quotient?
“I guess my bottom line is that your attitude toward taking risk doesn’t change that much…but your confidence increases to what once seemed like a risk is really just making a decision”
11. Three Gifts for A 20-Something (67)
”Friendship relationships are really important in your twenties because those are the people that will encourage you and give you your self-worth if you need that from other people. It all comes from within, but your friends can serve as fertilizer and water for you.”
12. Focus on Finding Out What You Want
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“Don’t worry about whether or not a guy likes you. Worry about whether or not YOU like THEM. It’s better to spend your time finding out what you want, what YOU prefer, than trying to fit anyone else’s idea of what you should be.”