I took off on my first trip very nervous about whether I could go it alone, if something terrible would happen, if I would be lonely…all the normal fears. On the plane, I wrote down my fears and stowed them away. When I found my list some weeks later, it was almost laughable.
Today I’m sharing a story I received recently from one of the 20-something women who submitted and received advice on this blog. Like many 20-somethings, she was looking for direction on what to do next in her career and life — hungering to achieve so many things, but overwhelmed with uncertainty on how to do make it happen.
“Everyone tells you to do what you love”, she said. “But I don’t know what I love because I’ve spent my life trying to do what will be best, what will work and what will be a success.”
For this 20-something, pushing herself to travel alone to unknown spots gave her the courage to make decisions and move forward in all areas of her life. I’m sharing her learning (with her permission) as motivation to other young women going through the same internal crisis and also to servie as a big thank you to all the women who contribute their advice here. It makes a difference. I will leave it to her as her letter speaks for itself. Good luck to her and thank you to all my readers and responders!
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I’m looking back just a few months at the advice you all offered and my what a change there has been! One of the recurring themes with women here is TRAVEL. Oh, hell yes travel! I’ve been on a few trips now and I can honestly say that if it was not for these experiences, I’d never be where I am now. The past few years have been rough for me and I’m sure many of your readers as well. Besides the crippled economy, when is it ever all smooth sailing? Never!
I took off on my first trip very nervous about whether I could go it alone, if something terrible would happen, if I would be lonely…all the normal fears. On the plane, I wrote down my fears and stowed them away. When I found my list some weeks later, it was almost laughable.
Yes, it was scary at first and yes I had to adjust…for about a day. Then I realized that I got around fine, could take care of myself, manage quite well in a foreign country and even be far more confident and outgoing than I am at home.
While part of the trip was relaxing others were a hot mess. I didn’t speak the language in one country, I was kicked out of churches, stranded in a monastery, hopelessly lost and accidentally wound up in the wrong city. I’d never gotten into (and out of) pickles like that here at home. Subsequently I’d never have gained the immense sense of confidence and self sufficiency that I learned from being out of my element and doing just fine.
There are two key elements to travel, for women especially; external discoveries and internal ones. They’re both equally important, but the latter has had a ripple effect on my life that has been more powerful than anything else I’ve experienced.
I left someone who was extremely self-conscious, anxious and lost in my own life. Ironically, it was getting lost and always finding my way home that helped me shed so much of that baggage and return with the mentality, “You know what, I CAN do this. It’s not the end of the world.”
I’ve become more assertive at work, experienced a noticeable decrease in anxiety, stress and the “need to please,” and I’ve done things that I’d never have even considered prior to traveling. One such thing being stand up comedy, which was nowhere in my plan, nowhere on the radar, until now.
I had the confidence to embark on an adventure for the pleasure, not for an anticipated end result. Now, it’s my passion and the foundation of a new career path.
I just want to say thank you. The souvenirs I’ve brought back from my travels have and will continue to shape my life in a way I never could have anticipated. Please keep pushing young women to break their boundaries and broaden their horizons. I hope one day, when I’ve built a solid foundation for myself, I have the opportunity to help other young women find the means to get lost and found too.
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