Three Gifts for a 20-Something: There Is No Role That Defines You

By Emily Betz, 40:20 Vision Ambassador

pixteller-design-a1af85321d11e9edWhat three “gifts” would you give a 20-something if you were a “Forty-Godmother”? Here 40-somethings share three wishes to help a 20-something get a head start on the confidence to make decisions that are right for themselves. No more woulda, coulda, shoulda.

  1. You are more.  I would make sure you know that you are more than the rules you put in your life. This comes from a moment in my career when I started to sacrifice everything for achieving. I would grant every 20-something the realization that our self-worth is so much bigger and deeper than any role we play in our life, including wife, mother, or worker. You are perfect the way you are. There is no role that defines you.
  1. Pick the right people. Surround yourself with people who know you love you and support you. For some people, that is their family; for others, it isn’t. It is important to really make a point of finding those people because they will be able to ground you during the rocky times.  Yours may be a friend or family member, but find people who can be your touch point for grounding.
  1. Protect your rituals. I’m not as good as this as I want to be, but find rituals that work for you and protect them. I’ve noticed as I have had kids, it’s easy to not focus on me. It has become so important that if I have a couple of things during the day that set me as priority, it makes a world of difference. One example is meditation; if i can do a 10 minute meditation, yoga class, or write down what I am grateful for, the quality of my day is so much better. Focus on things that are going well and lovely and sweet in your life – that can be a great ritual.

        -40-something adventurer, entrepreneur, mother, wife, and improv-performer (but really, none of those roles can alone define her).



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