Today we have a post from Stephanie Florence, 40:20 Vision’s contributing / Millennial editor, reflecting on her siblings’ recent weddings.
When I’m asked if I get home to Chicago often I typically laugh as I consider the last year. With siblings who were each married six weeks apart I think it’s safe to say I’ve been home quite a bit.
I am so happy that both of my siblings have found the person they will spend the rest of their lives with. I even captured the first duo-dance of the newlyweds, which you can view here. (My sister is the blond – thank goodness for the height my new brother is bringing to our family. And I think you can pick out my brother and my new sister to the left.)
While I raise my glass to different life plans, I will admit there is one piece of worry taking residence in the back of my head. When I went home for the holidays last year there were points when I felt like the odd woman out by not having a dude by my side. Couple that with everyone and her sister announcing on Facebook that she is either engaged or with child and you start to pay attention. Am I doing something wrong? Should I be in a serious relationship? Should I be concerned with settling down? Side note: whoever created the term “settling down” deserves a swift kick. The people in my life who are opening these new chapters are doing anything but settling – they’re launching new adventures.
As the holidays approach, I wonder if the worry will come back into play. My strongest defense to any of the negative questions is to remind myself of the feeling I get when I return to New York City. Anyone who has seen the skyline while driving over the Manhattan Bridge knows what I mean. It’s a feeling I can’t quite describe except for a sense of belonging. Just by writing this I’m quickly brought back to reality. I don’t need to set down roots in my 20s just because most people do. If something changes and I meet “the one” in the next three years – great. But if not, I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing (going with the flo(w), as it were). Focusing on the strong friendships I have – the ones I’m continuing back home and those that I’m cultivating in NYC. And focusing on my career, one that challenges me and motivates me every single day.
Anyone else in the same boat? Do you have your version of my “New York City skyline drive” that brings you back to reality?
To the 40s, 20s and gals in between and all around those years: How did/do you handle the times when questions like these took/take center stage?